TGIF

yup, its friday... so thank... gremlins its friday? since im not one that believes in god, which reminds me, many people have been tring to convert me at school, like the other day in science sean (some kid who is in some of my classes, sits next to me in science and has a locker near mine) asked me if i believed in god, i shruged and said i didnt know, he asked what religion i was and i said i didnt have one, so he started asking me about how i thought humans came to earth, so i asked if he was tring to convert me, and he said maybe and that was then end of that, and amber has been tring to convert me also, although i guess to convert id probably need a religion to begin with, and most people find it odd when i say i dont really know what i believe in, our family is suppose to be either cathlic or christan i cant remember, but really non of us really act as we believe in god, infact my sister is an atheist, i mean we mostly go with the flow... like when we have dinner with other familys, especially when im spending the night at the clarks and i say a prayer along with them, course im always pretty polite when eatting dinner with other families, i think the clarks are the only family i actually eat ENOUGH at, like... everywhere else i dont really put much on my plate, and i never talk much and im not really sure why, yet again... cept for the clarks house, i contribute to the conversation alot, which gets me another thought, why does it take me SO freaking long to get comfortable around people? i mean really, i seriously SUCK at feeling laid back with people, im still not totally comfortable with more than half of my friends! now is that not sad or what? anyways... off to an actual topic, if it can be called that, im back to my state of mind that thinks im just a nuesence, just a thing thats there, and more or less, it wouldnt be such a bad thing if i wasnt here anymore, infact, ive even had some thoughts of runnging away... course i know i cant do that, in every way possible, i cant sneak out at night... believe me ive thought about it, but chances are i wouldnt get very far, probably the farthest id go would be trevors house then id break down, and even if i could! i wouldnt be gone very long... id be so freaking miserable without all my friends that it would drag me back, and off of that topic... i think ii may start bringing my digital camera to school again, sarah wants pictures, and which gets me off on something else, WHY CANT EVERYTHING STAY THE SAME! i miss being such good friends with kyle and sarah, i miss being friends with stacy and erin, i miss being good friends with fuji and missy, i miss garret and ivy, i miss being best friends with mary, i miss those days when i was oh so innocent, i miss being the sweet innocent angie, i miss caring! i miss having one of my friends spend the night every weekend, i miss so many things... have you ever REALLY wanted to hug someone but didnt? ANYWAYS OMGTREVORSONLINENOWBAI!