sad... ANYWAYS today i went to downtown denver with my mom to take pictures, what was funny is i took most of them in the car while mom was searching for a place to park, when she did park i only had like 8 left X3 we walked, got a soda, i took pictures, ran out of film and gave money to a hobo ^_^ for those of you that know me very well one of my goals in life is to give money to a/some hobo/hobos, give food, and or befriend one so yay me!
after that we went to walmart because i was in desprete need of some clothes, mom got side tracked from the mission in the gardening area, when we got over to clothes, mom and i had a slight arguement, i say i feel comfortable in black and jeans and she says i should push the envelope and try new things, I DONT LIKE WEARING WHITE! two reasons, im a messy person and things show up more on white, and two, i dont need guys being able to see through my shirt, the less guys look at my cheat the better
and speaking of my chest, i finally have new bras ^_^ for the unlucky few of you, you got to hear me complain about it before, but freaking hell i need to stop growing, they get in the way as it is, how the hell did i go from training bra to hand me downs to a c or b cup, i mean really bleh... and oddly enough mom and i still have no idea what size bra i wear, i fit into a 34b and a 34c *shrug* whatever
in other news, i got new shoes ^_^ and a bunch of eyelinder, hair things and a new watch ^_________^ we went home with $200 worth of stuff whooo!
so thats it for my day
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
WHOO!
so, today the band kids are back, least most of them, so i got to see trevor YAY!
so ive been all... multilating my magazines lately for my walls sake
so me jared ben and trevor went to the movies, we went to see hoodwinked, although since i was giving trevor a ride, we were kinda late cause cassie had to take her car and because of the STUPID SNOW i had to sweep off the truck, which later gave me no seat belt, not too back when your inbetween two people so you cant really move anyways (better than that one time i went to aunt cindys in the truck with mom and cassie... we were bringing mirrors up there, and omg cassie had so much fun blinding me) anyways, trevor and i missed the beginning, but it was a good movie, kinda weird... reminded me of a video game, anyways, after we watched said movie we went outside, decided we needed food, so we ran around looking for a place to eat and found some... thai place which seemed more like a sit down resturant, and BJ's subs... well we just made fun of the name, (i almost find it sad how well i fit in with guys, and how comfortable i am with that, like.. okay so i had very very few guy friends before 8th grade, the ones i had only talked to me like... 1 every few months unless they sat by me in class ot something) anyways, we finally decided to go into some japanesse place thing... after awhile we realized we had to go up to the register to order XD and we had... also random conversations while we waited for our food and while we ate, all very entertaining, then we had a lot of going outside, going back inside because its cold, and there were these kids under the stair thing, and after they got up ben said we should go take that spot, we sat there for a couple minutes before one of the girls who had been sitting there came over to us and was all... bleh i dont like her she was like "you should get out of our spot" and being the nice people we are we were agreeable then as we were getting up she was like "yea you should think next time" i left out a "pfft" and tried not to laugh and jared joked and said "yea you guys should think" mean girl though... they got busted later for loitering ^_^ what goes around comes around? we finally decided to stay outside, ther was beat boxing, talking, and swing dancing, and well... me not being able to feel my hands, i did a cartwheel randomly, hurt my wrist the fourth time i did it, and... well came home ^____^ i got to the door and it was locked e_e i had to go to the back door, when i got in dad was coming out of his room and he said he had to put on pants to answer the door, and trevor called to see if i got inside, and i told him thats what dad said, he said my family has a problem with wearing pants XD because when he called me before today i was trying on some of mom old pants because mine are majorly worn out, and well he called me when i was right in the middle of putting on some pants, and i had to go ask my mom something and i was like "HOLDON! lemme finish putting on my pants" so yup... wheeee
RANDOM GOOD SONG
consequence of sounds
by regina spektor
My rhyme ain't good just yet,
My brain and tongue just met,
And they ain't friends, so far,
My words don’t travel far,
They tangle in my hair,
And tend to go nowhere,
They grow right back inside,
Right past my brain and eyes
Into my stomach juice
Where they don’t serve much use,
No healthy calories,
Nutrition values.
And I absorb back in
The words right through my skin
They sit there festering inside my bowels
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
Got a soundtrack in my mind,
All the time. Kids-
Screamin' from too much beat up
And they don't even rhyme,
They just stand there, on a street corner,
Skin tucked in
And meat side out and shot,
And I’d like to turn them down
But there ain't no knob.
Run into picket fences
Not into picket lines.
All this hippie-shit for the 60's
And another cliché for our time. But,
But a one of these days your heart
Will just stop ticking,
And they sorta just don't find you till your cubicle is reeking.
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ah ah
Did you know that the gravedigger's still
Gettin' stuck in the machine
Even tough it's a whole other daydream.
It's another town it's another world,
Where the kids are asleep, where the loans are paid
And the lawns are mowed.
Whad'ya think?
All the gravediggers were gone?
Just cause one song is done
There’s always another one,
Waiting right around the bend,
Till this one ends,
Then it begins
Sqeaky clean, then it starts all over again.
The weather report keeps on
Tossing and turning,
Predicting and warning,
And warning and warning of,
Possibly it could be news publications and,
Possibly it could be news TV stations. That
Very same morning right next to her coffee
She noticed some bleeding and heard hollow coughing and
National Geographic was being too graphic,
When all she had wanted to know was the traffic
“The worlds got a nosebleed” it said
“And we’re flooding but we keep on cutting
The trees and the forests!”
And we keep on paying those freaks on the TV,
Who claim they will save us but want to enslave us.
And sweating like demons they scream through our speakers
But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder.
And no one’s the killer and no one’s the martyr
The world that has made us can no longer contain us
And profits are silent then rotting away 'cause
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds.
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds.
Ah ah ah…
My rhyme ain't good just yet,
My brain and tongue just met,
And they aint friends, so far,
My words don't travel far,
They tangle in my hair,
And tend to go nowhere,
They grow right back inside,
Right past my brain and eyes
Into my stomach juice
Where they don't serve much use,
No healthy calories,
Nutrition values.
And I absorb back in
The words right through my skin
They sit there festering inside my bowels
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
YAY!
so ive been all... multilating my magazines lately for my walls sake
so me jared ben and trevor went to the movies, we went to see hoodwinked, although since i was giving trevor a ride, we were kinda late cause cassie had to take her car and because of the STUPID SNOW i had to sweep off the truck, which later gave me no seat belt, not too back when your inbetween two people so you cant really move anyways (better than that one time i went to aunt cindys in the truck with mom and cassie... we were bringing mirrors up there, and omg cassie had so much fun blinding me) anyways, trevor and i missed the beginning, but it was a good movie, kinda weird... reminded me of a video game, anyways, after we watched said movie we went outside, decided we needed food, so we ran around looking for a place to eat and found some... thai place which seemed more like a sit down resturant, and BJ's subs... well we just made fun of the name, (i almost find it sad how well i fit in with guys, and how comfortable i am with that, like.. okay so i had very very few guy friends before 8th grade, the ones i had only talked to me like... 1 every few months unless they sat by me in class ot something) anyways, we finally decided to go into some japanesse place thing... after awhile we realized we had to go up to the register to order XD and we had... also random conversations while we waited for our food and while we ate, all very entertaining, then we had a lot of going outside, going back inside because its cold, and there were these kids under the stair thing, and after they got up ben said we should go take that spot, we sat there for a couple minutes before one of the girls who had been sitting there came over to us and was all... bleh i dont like her she was like "you should get out of our spot" and being the nice people we are we were agreeable then as we were getting up she was like "yea you should think next time" i left out a "pfft" and tried not to laugh and jared joked and said "yea you guys should think" mean girl though... they got busted later for loitering ^_^ what goes around comes around? we finally decided to stay outside, ther was beat boxing, talking, and swing dancing, and well... me not being able to feel my hands, i did a cartwheel randomly, hurt my wrist the fourth time i did it, and... well came home ^____^ i got to the door and it was locked e_e i had to go to the back door, when i got in dad was coming out of his room and he said he had to put on pants to answer the door, and trevor called to see if i got inside, and i told him thats what dad said, he said my family has a problem with wearing pants XD because when he called me before today i was trying on some of mom old pants because mine are majorly worn out, and well he called me when i was right in the middle of putting on some pants, and i had to go ask my mom something and i was like "HOLDON! lemme finish putting on my pants" so yup... wheeee
RANDOM GOOD SONG
consequence of sounds
by regina spektor
My rhyme ain't good just yet,
My brain and tongue just met,
And they ain't friends, so far,
My words don’t travel far,
They tangle in my hair,
And tend to go nowhere,
They grow right back inside,
Right past my brain and eyes
Into my stomach juice
Where they don’t serve much use,
No healthy calories,
Nutrition values.
And I absorb back in
The words right through my skin
They sit there festering inside my bowels
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
Got a soundtrack in my mind,
All the time. Kids-
Screamin' from too much beat up
And they don't even rhyme,
They just stand there, on a street corner,
Skin tucked in
And meat side out and shot,
And I’d like to turn them down
But there ain't no knob.
Run into picket fences
Not into picket lines.
All this hippie-shit for the 60's
And another cliché for our time. But,
But a one of these days your heart
Will just stop ticking,
And they sorta just don't find you till your cubicle is reeking.
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
Ahh ah ah ah ahh ah ah ah
Did you know that the gravedigger's still
Gettin' stuck in the machine
Even tough it's a whole other daydream.
It's another town it's another world,
Where the kids are asleep, where the loans are paid
And the lawns are mowed.
Whad'ya think?
All the gravediggers were gone?
Just cause one song is done
There’s always another one,
Waiting right around the bend,
Till this one ends,
Then it begins
Sqeaky clean, then it starts all over again.
The weather report keeps on
Tossing and turning,
Predicting and warning,
And warning and warning of,
Possibly it could be news publications and,
Possibly it could be news TV stations. That
Very same morning right next to her coffee
She noticed some bleeding and heard hollow coughing and
National Geographic was being too graphic,
When all she had wanted to know was the traffic
“The worlds got a nosebleed” it said
“And we’re flooding but we keep on cutting
The trees and the forests!”
And we keep on paying those freaks on the TV,
Who claim they will save us but want to enslave us.
And sweating like demons they scream through our speakers
But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder.
And no one’s the killer and no one’s the martyr
The world that has made us can no longer contain us
And profits are silent then rotting away 'cause
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds.
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds.
Ah ah ah…
My rhyme ain't good just yet,
My brain and tongue just met,
And they aint friends, so far,
My words don't travel far,
They tangle in my hair,
And tend to go nowhere,
They grow right back inside,
Right past my brain and eyes
Into my stomach juice
Where they don't serve much use,
No healthy calories,
Nutrition values.
And I absorb back in
The words right through my skin
They sit there festering inside my bowels
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
The consonants and vowels
The consequence of sounds
YAY!
Makeup and streaking?
i had a really weird dream last night, mom and i walked through the front door and cassie immediately greeted us, i went into the kitchen to get some food and texted ellie, after a bit i called ellie and asked if she could go hangout or something, she said no she was busy then said something but cassie started talking to me and i couldnt hear ellie, then ellie was gone, after a couple minutes of waiting i hung up, then trevor, jared, and ellie put me on four way, and i aked if anyone was up for doing something tonight, after awhile we had nothing decided, and my phone disconnected, they never called back, instead kyle ran in my front door told me to get ready then ran downstairs, i did as i was told and then i was dragged to the mall, when we got there he gave me a threnchcoat and told me to take my clothes off because me and him and group of other people were going to have some sort of protest at the mall including streaking, one by one we got on stage, out in the crowd i saw ellie, and she looked at me in disbelief, before we could start streaking there was a gunshot and the next thing i knew i was on the ground with everyone crowded around me, they all walked with me to the hospital and that was it o_o; anyways imma go back to watching tv...
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Banklets, barbies, and binkies.
so tuesday... i think... we had csap... whooo e_e how stupid can you get with these questions, and i answered some of them with some pretty stupid but logical answers... like there was this one problem of folding a blanket, no sane person is going to start doing math when they want to fold up a blanket, and since it is fabric after some point its not going to fold, even if the simple math you do says it does, so the question asked, something like after what point will it be illogical to keep folding the blanket, i said when it started getting to half inches, cause no one is that much of a perfectionist to get out a ruler and make sure its that big, so anyways, csap, i was in a room with some people i knew, mostly because they categorized us by last name, so obviously i had seem these people at one time or another, we had two micheal smiths though, and lana and ariel reminised about me having a locker under both of them, and i remembered all the times they had dropped books on me
they gave us two breaks, one of which we could walk around for ten or fifteen minutes, inwhich time, trevor found lana and i and gave us gum, after the mess of csap, i ate lunch alone yippy
so the day after that, was a huge latestart, we didnt have to go to school till like noon, trevor came over and we played games and watched movies, the first period i had that day made me sleepy faster than ever, i was really hyper when i got to school because i had chugged down a rootbeer float, then we watched a movie on the legislative branch, science i was still tired and adi woke me up after i told her about fish day (april first for all of you that dont know) and so she put like 20 sticky notes on me that said fish i think i ate alone that day too
tursday, ...day before yesterday
band kids off to newyork, that made me happy *sarcasm* almost all of my friends are band geeks, trevor gave me a present, and after school i went to the mall with erin, i bought to things, both if which youll probably see when we get back to school
yesterday i gloomed up the house with me and my depressedness and boredom, and i still havent cleaned my room, i got a call from trevor last night, im not sure if it helped me or not, all i know is that i feel oh so left behind
TODAY! i woke up super early, for me anyways, 7am, i woke up hearing little twin voices, as soon as i walked out of my room sammy yelled angie and hugged me, andrew did the same, we played and set up a doll house which happened for like...3 hours, then we all got packed up and went to the mall, sammy and i ran, cassie yelled at me for influencing her, how can i not? anyways, i think im over my fear of a place to grow at the mills, i played with the stuff there, andnow that im over my fear, im horribly angry with one of the machines, for it wouldnt let me win tic tac toe, i took a bunch of pictures, but most of the time as soon as it took the picture one of them had already run out of the frame, we walked around build a bear, and sammy almost got a time out for eatting the stuffing, we ran out of quarters on the machines and i got a picture of them hugging bob the builder, and they started singing "bob the builder can we fix it bob the builder" then id cut in and say no we cant! we ate some starbucks, and walked around, then we went to the food court and ben found me and waved, im pretty sure he saw me skipping and swinging andrew aroudn too, and then we rode the caresel, sadly enough the lady told me to ride it too instead of standing, andrew and samy got horses, and i rose a bunny, the hell, why would someone ride a bunny? anyways, after that we went home, we colored, and ate some lunch, and now theyre talking a nap, so is mom and cassie, i should be too but... meh computers better, and besides, i really suck at sleeping in the middle of the day unless im at aunt cindys, i think im going up there today though anyways... so most of my friends have been in newyork... for like 2 days, and i already miss them all terribly, when they get back im going to glomp atleast one of them...
anyways! i think im going toooo... um... upload some baby pictures now ^_^
they gave us two breaks, one of which we could walk around for ten or fifteen minutes, inwhich time, trevor found lana and i and gave us gum, after the mess of csap, i ate lunch alone yippy
so the day after that, was a huge latestart, we didnt have to go to school till like noon, trevor came over and we played games and watched movies, the first period i had that day made me sleepy faster than ever, i was really hyper when i got to school because i had chugged down a rootbeer float, then we watched a movie on the legislative branch, science i was still tired and adi woke me up after i told her about fish day (april first for all of you that dont know) and so she put like 20 sticky notes on me that said fish i think i ate alone that day too
tursday, ...day before yesterday
band kids off to newyork, that made me happy *sarcasm* almost all of my friends are band geeks, trevor gave me a present, and after school i went to the mall with erin, i bought to things, both if which youll probably see when we get back to school
yesterday i gloomed up the house with me and my depressedness and boredom, and i still havent cleaned my room, i got a call from trevor last night, im not sure if it helped me or not, all i know is that i feel oh so left behind
TODAY! i woke up super early, for me anyways, 7am, i woke up hearing little twin voices, as soon as i walked out of my room sammy yelled angie and hugged me, andrew did the same, we played and set up a doll house which happened for like...3 hours, then we all got packed up and went to the mall, sammy and i ran, cassie yelled at me for influencing her, how can i not? anyways, i think im over my fear of a place to grow at the mills, i played with the stuff there, andnow that im over my fear, im horribly angry with one of the machines, for it wouldnt let me win tic tac toe, i took a bunch of pictures, but most of the time as soon as it took the picture one of them had already run out of the frame, we walked around build a bear, and sammy almost got a time out for eatting the stuffing, we ran out of quarters on the machines and i got a picture of them hugging bob the builder, and they started singing "bob the builder can we fix it bob the builder" then id cut in and say no we cant! we ate some starbucks, and walked around, then we went to the food court and ben found me and waved, im pretty sure he saw me skipping and swinging andrew aroudn too, and then we rode the caresel, sadly enough the lady told me to ride it too instead of standing, andrew and samy got horses, and i rose a bunny, the hell, why would someone ride a bunny? anyways, after that we went home, we colored, and ate some lunch, and now theyre talking a nap, so is mom and cassie, i should be too but... meh computers better, and besides, i really suck at sleeping in the middle of the day unless im at aunt cindys, i think im going up there today though anyways... so most of my friends have been in newyork... for like 2 days, and i already miss them all terribly, when they get back im going to glomp atleast one of them...
anyways! i think im going toooo... um... upload some baby pictures now ^_^
Monday, March 13, 2006
Love without complication galore
so, another school day.... csap tomorrow and such...bleh, i hate csap, i dont like the fact i have to be quiet for so long
anyways today! i was the replacement fuji, fuji was home sick, verrry sick, so i was the replacement, and if for some reason i cant fufill my duties, we al know mustard can replace me
...so cassies mad at me now, i seem to screw up alot now dont i?
anyways first period was english, we did some things with suffixs and prefixs, and tomorrow we get to do something infront of the class so well all remember the joys of suffixes and prefixxes, im in a group with KC kristen and laurel, were doing sokmething with ninjas, pirates and ghandi
...heh, some people know how to cheer me up without knowning im upset...
anways on to second period, fuji was gone so i talking to myself, and i sat in her seat, i was the replacement fuji after all
third period, i well... goofed off most of that period, erin and i had been ahead, so mr owens made me take the attendence down to the office instead of watching the movie
fourth we had a test, i bet i failed
lunch, well... that was fun, laura and i went for walks around the school, along with phillip, and everything is fun with phillip, and he put lauras backpack in the tree
fifth... i dont remember... i think we were talking about csap... that cant be good
sixth, we did our commercial about martinique and roughly translated....
Adam:HELLO PEOPLE, do you like the tropics? (i think anyways, i cant remember straight...)
Me: Yes! The tropical is magical
Adam: *walks over to ryan* HELLO PERSON OF AMERICA! would you like to go to martinique?
Ryan: (in english) BOY WOULD I! (in french randomly) i would speak friend to get to martinique!
All together now!: *singing* martinique est bon, martinique est amusant... est..... *looks like we forgot what we were thinging* ... TRES BON!
(in english: martinique is good, martinique is fun....is.... (looks like we forgot what we were thinking*.... VERY GOOD!
Adam: GO VISIT MARTINIQUE!
Ryan and me: its a trip! *cowering*
so yup... that was it
seventh, i goofed off again, i didnt have my film done... take pictures of downtown denver while its snowing? i dont think so e_e
got home and made a bandana that has ninja written on it, i made it out of an old shirt which is still too big for me, but has enough holes to make it so i wont wear it
i got upset
and now im fine... kinda...
for now anyways, as long as sarah doesnt bring trevor up like that in the middle of a fight again..
anyways today! i was the replacement fuji, fuji was home sick, verrry sick, so i was the replacement, and if for some reason i cant fufill my duties, we al know mustard can replace me
...so cassies mad at me now, i seem to screw up alot now dont i?
anyways first period was english, we did some things with suffixs and prefixs, and tomorrow we get to do something infront of the class so well all remember the joys of suffixes and prefixxes, im in a group with KC kristen and laurel, were doing sokmething with ninjas, pirates and ghandi
...heh, some people know how to cheer me up without knowning im upset...
anways on to second period, fuji was gone so i talking to myself, and i sat in her seat, i was the replacement fuji after all
third period, i well... goofed off most of that period, erin and i had been ahead, so mr owens made me take the attendence down to the office instead of watching the movie
fourth we had a test, i bet i failed
lunch, well... that was fun, laura and i went for walks around the school, along with phillip, and everything is fun with phillip, and he put lauras backpack in the tree
fifth... i dont remember... i think we were talking about csap... that cant be good
sixth, we did our commercial about martinique and roughly translated....
Adam:HELLO PEOPLE, do you like the tropics? (i think anyways, i cant remember straight...)
Me: Yes! The tropical is magical
Adam: *walks over to ryan* HELLO PERSON OF AMERICA! would you like to go to martinique?
Ryan: (in english) BOY WOULD I! (in french randomly) i would speak friend to get to martinique!
All together now!: *singing* martinique est bon, martinique est amusant... est..... *looks like we forgot what we were thinging* ... TRES BON!
(in english: martinique is good, martinique is fun....is.... (looks like we forgot what we were thinking*.... VERY GOOD!
Adam: GO VISIT MARTINIQUE!
Ryan and me: its a trip! *cowering*
so yup... that was it
seventh, i goofed off again, i didnt have my film done... take pictures of downtown denver while its snowing? i dont think so e_e
got home and made a bandana that has ninja written on it, i made it out of an old shirt which is still too big for me, but has enough holes to make it so i wont wear it
i got upset
and now im fine... kinda...
for now anyways, as long as sarah doesnt bring trevor up like that in the middle of a fight again..
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Forgot lunch:Regress 6 years in age
so, today i was told i was like an elementary schooler by four people, one of which was a teacher, im starting to think it was because i was so hungry
ANYWAYS at lunch i jumped in puddles even though i hate snow and the cold, which reminds me, this morning i looked outside and saw it snowing, i started pouting and called to mom, anyways i went puddle jumping during lunch, math i kept whining, and photography... welllll... we were hand coloring out prints, with paint... IWASJUSTFINEUNTILTHATSTUPIDORANGE okay so i was just fine the paint was staying only on my fingers and my print, then i wanted more orange, and the fact that the packages are metally the sides broke and got on my hands and pants, me trying to get some of the paint off my pants smeared it more, julianna said i might as well just put some other paint on my pants and make it look even, tashi took that as an invitation to put the little bit of paint she got on her fingertips on my pants, great, then i got some on my sweater pushing up my sleeves and some on my face, so yea, ms s., thea and julianna called me a little kid in photography *shrug* guess im just a kid at heart
ANYWAYS at lunch i jumped in puddles even though i hate snow and the cold, which reminds me, this morning i looked outside and saw it snowing, i started pouting and called to mom, anyways i went puddle jumping during lunch, math i kept whining, and photography... welllll... we were hand coloring out prints, with paint... IWASJUSTFINEUNTILTHATSTUPIDORANGE okay so i was just fine the paint was staying only on my fingers and my print, then i wanted more orange, and the fact that the packages are metally the sides broke and got on my hands and pants, me trying to get some of the paint off my pants smeared it more, julianna said i might as well just put some other paint on my pants and make it look even, tashi took that as an invitation to put the little bit of paint she got on her fingertips on my pants, great, then i got some on my sweater pushing up my sleeves and some on my face, so yea, ms s., thea and julianna called me a little kid in photography *shrug* guess im just a kid at heart
Monday, March 06, 2006
What goes on in the dark room, stayyys... on angie's blog
XD so today in photography we have out totally random conversations, and thea and i were saying how wed really rather NOT die old, she said shed throw herself off a building before she let that happen, and i said something like "yea it seems more painful to live to be old than it does to die young, by your 60's your heavyly medicated, ceniyle, and you annoy the hell out of your relatives" and then thea said she wanted to die from falling off a building, and i said i wanted to die by clowns, it got all quiet then ivy says "angie, your creepy" XD IHADTOTELLYOUALLL!
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Malfunctioning Angie
theres something wrong with me... i know it... there has to be, why else would i be like this....
i was so cold to him on the phone
i lied
im not okay, im not fine, im horrible and i dont know why
i tried calling back but he didnt pick up
i cant stop crying and i dont know why
theres something wring with me
how else could i be like this?
i was so cold to him on the phone
i lied
im not okay, im not fine, im horrible and i dont know why
i tried calling back but he didnt pick up
i cant stop crying and i dont know why
theres something wring with me
how else could i be like this?
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
people passing out=bad? who knew *obvious sarcasm*
SO, you know what i find sad? the girl that made my life hell through 8th grade, the one who made fun of me because i was different, has no idea what the hell my name is, ive only been in the same school as her for how many years? for those of you who dont know who im talking about its jessica, miss full of herself, i mean really, yesterday in science she decided she wanted to pass out papers, she had to call my name out, how freakin sad is that? she picked me out last year to make fun of me and now she doesnt know my name, but it did trigger a compliament towards me from micheal, he said my
goggles were kick ass
in other news, i hink im getting sick, you know that feeling in your throat and you just know the next day youll be sick? thats how ive been feeling all day, that and i about coughed up blood today
other other news, i went to fujis today during lunch, i got to hold pixie their new dog, i wanted to conceal it in my sweater and run, the dog actually liked me too, or atleast tolerated me, it kept growling at missy
anyways, my thinking too much has returned... so you know i shall return with more rants
SO, you know what i find sad? the girl that made my life hell through 8th grade, the one who made fun of me because i was different, has no idea what the hell my name is, ive only been in the same school as her for how many years? for those of you who dont know who im talking about its jessica, miss full of herself, i mean really, yesterday in science she decided she wanted to pass out papers, she had to call my name out, how freakin sad is that? she picked me out last year to make fun of me and now she doesnt know my name, but it did trigger a compliament towards me from micheal, he said my
goggles were kick ass
in other news, i hink im getting sick, you know that feeling in your throat and you just know the next day youll be sick? thats how ive been feeling all day, that and i about coughed up blood today
other other news, i went to fujis today during lunch, i got to hold pixie their new dog, i wanted to conceal it in my sweater and run, the dog actually liked me too, or atleast tolerated me, it kept growling at missy
anyways, my thinking too much has returned... so you know i shall return with more rants
Monday, February 27, 2006
Friday, February 24, 2006
Here you go, your baby is a perfect sphere.
so tonight i went to ellies house to do my cultural project for french, we watched a french movie, and it was almost sad how much fun we were having with such a depressing movie, now i would go on to tell about this wonderous night of foot orgys, but i think id get mauled by someone, most likely amy, and really she hits hard, so anyways imma rant, just because i can, and i cant be spoken over, which is exactly what my rant is about, so yes i do like haning out with my friends in large groups, aside from the fact that there are so many inside jokes i seem to be left out of, its really fun, up until i try to say something, i dont know why but people will listen to me for a couple seconds then someone else will start talking and all attention goes to them, i mean i really wonder if im that soft spoken, because i thought i was pretty loud, and yea okay it does hurt, but what can i do? ellie suggested me just saying shut up and tell the rest of my story, but when i tell people to shut up they get irritated with me and rather not listen to me at all, or just start laughing and "fine you dont get to hear my story" goes absolutly no where, maybe people just dont like my stories, which i guess would confirm that i am infact not funny, and i mean i do want to contibute to the conversation but after so many times of being spoken over i give up, so if any of you see me randomly start to isolate myself and stop talking during a group outting, its probably because no one would listen to me, and i mean its not like it just happens sometimes, but all the time, even when im talking with one person, theyll go off on a rant in the middle of my sentence, and ill stop talking and listen, maybe its my fault, im not assertive enough or something, and sometimes i just give up before the conversations starts because i know i wont be heard, which is okay i guess, i do like listening to all the stupid crazy stuff my friends come up with, so anyways, end of rant now, imma go photoshop and or watch foamy ^_^
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
wanna buy a phillip? a what... a phillip... is it black? WHAT!NO ITS NOT PINK YOU WHORE!
SOOOOO! yesterday! i spent from the time i got home from school till... 5 i think to take pictures at belmare, then i spent till bedtime cleaning my room, OMGITSCLEAN anyways, last night and the other couples nights ive been... sleeping weird i guess? i dont know, i keep waking up at random times and it feels like ive been sleeping for hours but its only been 20 minutes, its weird... very fufilling though, anyways, cassie was awake, and woke me up this morning, english we had disscussions the whole period, government erin and i made up a scenario, and man it was fun X3 she forgot it though so were doing it on tuesday, annnnd... lunch phillip monika laurel and erin and i all played the you wanna buy a duck game X3 like all of lunch too, then when the bell rang phillip grabbed my soda and ran off with it T_T i chased him and almost killed myself trying to jump on him, (he stuck his foot out and i tripped) and i didnt gte it back till math started... then he stole it back and i didnt get it back till i stole his book, and then i almost didnt get it back, photography i developed film then i drew on the chalk board and we had a sub, omg she was so nice and she had the coolest accent ^____^ and gosh... ivy is so nice, its just like zomigawdooze, i mean seriously, she let me listen to her ipod, and man if i ever need a confidience boost i let her see my pictures o_o; shes such a good photographer and she loves it i know it, but shes always so down on herself, and shes sooooo good, and well after that i found lana and stuff and me her and jared walked down a couple streets found jareds mom and she drove us the rest of the way XD its funny how normal conversations with lana and jared can turn so odd so fastanyways at lanas we did our french thing which i needto memorize, and every time i saw joey id go "ITSS YOOOOOOU" then id pet him and id say "ILOVEYOOOOOU" and hed run off as soon as he heard i love you so it went like "ITSJOEY! i loveee yooooooouuu.... come backkkkk!" so anyways now i have sims 2 and im going to whore it to no end... or atleast till i get fed up with the sims not doing what i want or them piddling on the floor
Monday, February 13, 2006
I miss one day of school... ONE DAY
so alas friday i was sick from school, i missed three tests, first period (english) i was just bored beyond comprihension, you know why? because the WHOLE period all we were doing was talking about the homework project we got on friday and did over the weekend, second period (studyhall) i got lost, out whole small feild trip to the new study hall on thurday last week did me no good, consitering they showed me the wrong room, i wasnt there long, for i had to go to science to make up my science test (by then i had already done my missed french test... well all except the listening portion i get to do that tomorrow morning during access) 3rd period (gov.) my GOD i was basically just highlighting things ^_^; cause our class is already behind to begin with, ms clappham hopes me to have my rough draft of my constitution done by tomorrow, i dont think thats going to happen, lunch! finally! some time to relax, well kinda, there was alot of laughing with jared and almost choking on whatever i was eatting or drinking at the moment, and kicking joe ^_____^ i just find it fun to act like imma kick him and he immediately flinches and says hes wrong and sorry o_o; too bad that doesnt work on cassie, math, well confusion, and attempting to ignore chanler e_e he keeps asking me to draw him, but you know imma get yelled at while im trying to draw his pose since he sits BEHIND me -_-; french, we mostly just talked about lui and luer, photography, i bulk loaded and organized... i should shoot tonight but, there isnt much daylight left since i came home late, ill do it tomorrow, hopefully with a friend or something, anyways, after school i took my math test, omg HORRIBLEIDIDHORRIBLE i know it T_T none of the answers made sense one of the questions didnt make sense to me at all and i think it was worth like 8 points T_______T one of the calculater problems came out as error and i checked it three times... after that i went to the front of the school and talked to kelly, then she left along with some other people then i talked to nanet (i think thats how you spell it) jessica, and emily, we all kinda left at the same time, and i gave emily a ride home and when we were close to her house were like "OMGROUTTWAYWELIVEONTHATSTREETTHATISNTTHATSTREET" (theres two routt ways, and i found it odd that theyre both by seperate robbs, and theyre both seperate churches, and theyre both by seprate simmis, like they just decided to make some roads within walking distance with the same names, that dont connect, mom said they might have at one time, i started laughing that someone would just come along and go "HEY LETS BUILT OUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD AND MAKE A COLDASAC!" X3 now im home, and listening to cassie go on to her friend jeremy about meth labs
TOMORROWS VALENTINES DAY! do you got your sweetheart? we all know trevors got his, its todd <3
TOMORROWS VALENTINES DAY! do you got your sweetheart? we all know trevors got his, its todd <3
Saturday, February 11, 2006
hokay! so heyaws da erth
so, i like just back from the mall with justin cassie a guy named george, fun time, i saw 10 people i knew from school though, eight if you count people i can name so i saw kelly, joanna, emily, laura, and ashley, travis, jenny, and cj only two of them reacted to me at all, which were kelly and travis, kelly talked to me and travis gave me the peace sign, i think its kinda funny... how so many of my friends can go to the mall... and im left at home unless theyre in need of a ride, or i invite them to go with me... sad eh?
Friday, February 10, 2006
Error: Does not compute
so after a bit of confusion, on with the rant
valentines day- yippy yet another hoiliday, only this one isnt built around belief, but presents to show that "special someone" you "care" i mean how much thought does it take to BUY something for this holiday, theres things everywhere because its one of those stessfull holidays of "will they like my gift!?" only with a dash of "is my relationship going to come crashing down because she hates this type of chocolate?!" and oh the joy, when it does come crashing down and thats "special someone" finally tells you they were having an affair with the house keeper, whooo! now, i know this doesnt happen to every relationship, you see i used to like valentines day, up till whenever they stopped forcing us to bring valentines for all, then well its just another happy reminder your alone, youd think my attitude would change, seeing as this year is the first year i actually have a boyfriend, but really, i think its sad, companys explode with advertizements and those stress ridden couples go to them in their time of need, which is exactly why they jack up the prices and you end up spending over 40 bucks on a buch of flowers, (seriously, i saw a commercial today about some place that was selling flowers for that much, and it was mostly said because it reminded me of jared and the EXTREME rock paper scissors, because well... they kept saying EXTREME through the entire commetcial) ANYWAYS so, by the end of the holiday everyones broke, several relationships are in a wreak, and id really rather not have that happen to mine (he pays for enough stuff for me as it is >.> and wont take the money back either) i mean yea sure its nice to give and recive things but everyone says "its the thought that counts" and really, going to a store and buying some stuff doesnt take much thought i think, i mean hey, being as im broke that doesnt really matter to me cause i make most of my gifts anyways, but i realized how hard it was to get gifts for guys at christmas when buying for my nephews and trevor and andrew... although andrews the easiest, i mean hes... 3 or four i cant remember i mean get him a bob the builder poster, a slinky, and hes set for hours newphews are the second easiest, something to hurt something whooo theyre set for years, but anyways i degress, so im trying to buy in to all of this because i think it might be important for trevor and well, im not doing so well on thinking of a present, especially since whenever i start drawing i mess up, hate it and rip it out of my sketchbook, great eh?
on a slightly different subject, i was talking to liz and well, we both realized how horrible the world is, i mean how many girls are pregnant freshman at our school alone? seven or something? an then those ones that arent pregnant are bragging around to their buddies "oh hey you know that one guy, we fucked" now isnt that something to be proud of, getting knocked up before graduating, whooo, great story to tell your kids if they survive having a fourteen year old mom, lets see ya try to tell them how romantic the back seat of a car was, i mean hell even i have friends that have done it, and it makes me sad really
TOTALLYOFFTOPICNEWS! im off the myspace frenzie, deleting my account as i type this, my mom got all paranoid about pretitors, looked at my myspace then cassies, she made cassie change where she lives, cassie comes up stairs and yells at me for having my school on there, so rather than get anyone more upset, i just decided to delete it, not like people really talked to me on there anyways, myspace is overrated anyways
more offtopic news, im sick, yippy skippy im sick... acturally i wish i would have gone ot school today, i had three tests, i miessed vital information in government according to erin, and i missed the critquing in photography which was one of my favorite parts T_T now im gonna be slightly behind these next two weeks in photography consitering i dont have film or even know what the project is anyways, since no ones really online that wants to talk to me imma go back to my watching tv, baiiii
valentines day- yippy yet another hoiliday, only this one isnt built around belief, but presents to show that "special someone" you "care" i mean how much thought does it take to BUY something for this holiday, theres things everywhere because its one of those stessfull holidays of "will they like my gift!?" only with a dash of "is my relationship going to come crashing down because she hates this type of chocolate?!" and oh the joy, when it does come crashing down and thats "special someone" finally tells you they were having an affair with the house keeper, whooo! now, i know this doesnt happen to every relationship, you see i used to like valentines day, up till whenever they stopped forcing us to bring valentines for all, then well its just another happy reminder your alone, youd think my attitude would change, seeing as this year is the first year i actually have a boyfriend, but really, i think its sad, companys explode with advertizements and those stress ridden couples go to them in their time of need, which is exactly why they jack up the prices and you end up spending over 40 bucks on a buch of flowers, (seriously, i saw a commercial today about some place that was selling flowers for that much, and it was mostly said because it reminded me of jared and the EXTREME rock paper scissors, because well... they kept saying EXTREME through the entire commetcial) ANYWAYS so, by the end of the holiday everyones broke, several relationships are in a wreak, and id really rather not have that happen to mine (he pays for enough stuff for me as it is >.> and wont take the money back either) i mean yea sure its nice to give and recive things but everyone says "its the thought that counts" and really, going to a store and buying some stuff doesnt take much thought i think, i mean hey, being as im broke that doesnt really matter to me cause i make most of my gifts anyways, but i realized how hard it was to get gifts for guys at christmas when buying for my nephews and trevor and andrew... although andrews the easiest, i mean hes... 3 or four i cant remember i mean get him a bob the builder poster, a slinky, and hes set for hours newphews are the second easiest, something to hurt something whooo theyre set for years, but anyways i degress, so im trying to buy in to all of this because i think it might be important for trevor and well, im not doing so well on thinking of a present, especially since whenever i start drawing i mess up, hate it and rip it out of my sketchbook, great eh?
on a slightly different subject, i was talking to liz and well, we both realized how horrible the world is, i mean how many girls are pregnant freshman at our school alone? seven or something? an then those ones that arent pregnant are bragging around to their buddies "oh hey you know that one guy, we fucked" now isnt that something to be proud of, getting knocked up before graduating, whooo, great story to tell your kids if they survive having a fourteen year old mom, lets see ya try to tell them how romantic the back seat of a car was, i mean hell even i have friends that have done it, and it makes me sad really
TOTALLYOFFTOPICNEWS! im off the myspace frenzie, deleting my account as i type this, my mom got all paranoid about pretitors, looked at my myspace then cassies, she made cassie change where she lives, cassie comes up stairs and yells at me for having my school on there, so rather than get anyone more upset, i just decided to delete it, not like people really talked to me on there anyways, myspace is overrated anyways
more offtopic news, im sick, yippy skippy im sick... acturally i wish i would have gone ot school today, i had three tests, i miessed vital information in government according to erin, and i missed the critquing in photography which was one of my favorite parts T_T now im gonna be slightly behind these next two weeks in photography consitering i dont have film or even know what the project is anyways, since no ones really online that wants to talk to me imma go back to my watching tv, baiiii
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
stab a knife in the back let the blood drip down...
do you all remember those little clapping games we all used to do in elementary school like miss mary mac, and dum dum day... dum dum dayyy dum dum alay alay, ce ce sayyy ce ce alay alay, mini mini echo mini mini alay alay, mini mini echo, mini mini alay alay, cocoa pie cocoa pie cocoa pie oh yes... who the hell came up with that? or miss susie had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell ding ding, miss susie went to heven the steamboat went to hell-oo operator please give me number nine and if you disconnect me ill kick you from be-hinnnnd the frigorator there was a piece of glass, miss susie sat upon it and broke her lieelt as-sk me no more questions tell me no more lies, the boys are in the bathroom zipping up- the flies are in the medow the bees are in the bark, miss susie and her boyfriend are kissing in the d-a-r-k d-a-r-k dark dark, darker than the ocean darker than the sea, darker than the fat boy chasing after me and well the rest after that gets alittle fuzzy, and then there was always the one we did at sleep overs (or atleast i did) crack and egg on the head let the yoke run down crack and egg on the head let the yoke run down, people are dying children are crying, stab a knife in the back let the blood drip down, stab a knife in the back let the blood drip down, people are dying children are crying, you know what? i miss that, i miss not having to worry... oh how i wish i was five agan... id do that surgery a thousand times over if the pain of emotions would stop
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
STOP SELLING MY FRIENDS HOUSES!
freakin hell, if i could remember what number i left off on id keep on counting, for those of you that are confused, i counted up all the friends who had left, whether it be from my switching schools, them moving, or something else, i got up to the forties, then it stopped for awhile and i stopped counting, i stopped worrying, i got more friends, established relationships, and forgot about the pain of someone leaving
then lee moved, i cried, i regretted not spending more time with her, i missed the old days in art with her me james and connor
james moved or is moving, and might be switching schools
lauras moving
i feel so left out and left behind, yes i was friends with laura, i still am i guess, but no matter how hard i try its like... she doesnt trust me, same with ashley, and mariah, between the three of them they keep so many secrets, mention a bit to me expecting me to know then yanking it away like theyre trying to tease me, they say "oh ill tell you later, i promise" it never happenes... im paient and everything, but im sick and tired of promises, kelly saying she promises as soon as shes ungrounded well hang out, weeks go by and nothing happens, i mention it to her again, she makes another promise, and yet another promise broken, this amung other things is why i hate people, i hate humans, they scare me to death quite honestly, i mean look at our world, people hurting each other left and right, there is almost nothing that you can say that wont offend someone, and people wonder why im quiet
speaking of offencive things, in one of my classes some people in my group were talking about cutting, if you know me well enough you know this is a soft spot for me, they start joking around, as if theyre the type of people that labels any sad looking kid as emo and yells at them to go home and slit their wrists, and you all wonder why someone would want to take their life, the mocking, the pressure all of us endure, especially at school, its a wonder more havent suceeded
have any of you taken a good look at the arms of the people in our school, most of them you can find several scars
yet again im back to only having fun in photography, my love, too bad i have a block, or maybe less of a block and more of i have a bunch of ideas, i just dont scratch that, cant put them on paper, no matter how hard i try
now you all have another taste of my life, its like a freaking baskinrobins
then lee moved, i cried, i regretted not spending more time with her, i missed the old days in art with her me james and connor
james moved or is moving, and might be switching schools
lauras moving
i feel so left out and left behind, yes i was friends with laura, i still am i guess, but no matter how hard i try its like... she doesnt trust me, same with ashley, and mariah, between the three of them they keep so many secrets, mention a bit to me expecting me to know then yanking it away like theyre trying to tease me, they say "oh ill tell you later, i promise" it never happenes... im paient and everything, but im sick and tired of promises, kelly saying she promises as soon as shes ungrounded well hang out, weeks go by and nothing happens, i mention it to her again, she makes another promise, and yet another promise broken, this amung other things is why i hate people, i hate humans, they scare me to death quite honestly, i mean look at our world, people hurting each other left and right, there is almost nothing that you can say that wont offend someone, and people wonder why im quiet
speaking of offencive things, in one of my classes some people in my group were talking about cutting, if you know me well enough you know this is a soft spot for me, they start joking around, as if theyre the type of people that labels any sad looking kid as emo and yells at them to go home and slit their wrists, and you all wonder why someone would want to take their life, the mocking, the pressure all of us endure, especially at school, its a wonder more havent suceeded
have any of you taken a good look at the arms of the people in our school, most of them you can find several scars
yet again im back to only having fun in photography, my love, too bad i have a block, or maybe less of a block and more of i have a bunch of ideas, i just dont scratch that, cant put them on paper, no matter how hard i try
now you all have another taste of my life, its like a freaking baskinrobins
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
oh look something shiney
so i feel drained, absolutly and totally drained, more so than ive ever felt before, i dont feel enthused about much, i had a shorter attention than i ever have had, im easily discouraged, i yawn about 20 times per class, i have no idea how i am, i dont remember how it is to feel happy, sad, disappointed, anything... i just... dont feel anything, its kinda scary...
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
i feel like screaming...
okie... SO! my day was just fine until 3rd period in am gov. either levi or sheldon shot something at me...im sick of them... science wasnt much better... am i really a perfectionist? ...lunch was fun... math sucked.. french... well i won go fish by mass folding... i won all the chips whooo... and i only had three pizzas... photography... um... *shrug* ... ah hell im just not in the mood for anything right now, mary is going back to michigan tomorrow morning... and i barely hung out with her at all... fuck
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